Rough Draft

Recently, I came across the analogy that life is like a rough draft.  With each new day, you have a chance to edit what you did the day before.

I think it's important for all of us to realize this.  Each sunrise brings a fresh start- a new page if you will.  A chance to rearrange our outlines, add stuff in, or remove it.

There are days when I am left defeated, and I go to bed with a scroll playing in my head of where I went wrong or how it could have gone differently.  But, I know I can wake up and start over again.

As a mother, especially with my oldest, I am constantly struggling with new situations I find myself in.  I wonder if I could have handled it differently or if only I didn't say that...  The good news is tomorrow I will be more prepared from what I faced today.

As an athlete, sometimes I just have a bad day.  Maybe I missed a lift I got before, or I am struggling to get to a movement I am training to master.  Today is a dry run of what tomorrow will bring.  I can learn from my mistakes, and I am gaining from my attempts.

Sometimes we will do things that cannot be changed.  We cannot undo them, but we can take those situations and turn them into new stories.  We can learn and grow as we were meant to do.

Most of us have plans- we know what we want from life and expect certain things to happen.  Oftentimes life is happening while we are making other plans.  Just when you think you've got it figured out, something comes at you out of left field.  Get out a fresh sheet of paper and start from there.

It's nice to have a plan and be driven.  But we must always have room for the possibility of something else.

Our plans, our hopes, and dreams, they are our rough draft.  We must always have space for living the real story as it unfolds.

We must always be mindful that when we are at our worst, the story is not over.  It is not cause to put the pencil and paper away.  It is more reason than ever to keep going.

Live on the page of today.  Tomorrow is still a rough draft.  Do not live thinking about tomorrow when you still haven't finished today.  

Ten Seconds

I saw an awesome movie tonight- Race.  It was about Jesse Owens- and I highly recommend it.

Jesse was black and in college during the 1930's when racism was high around the world.  He was asked to take a stand for black people and the jewish people in Germany and not go to the Olympics. He offered this in retort- (sorry not a direct quote because I can't remember it word for word- but it gets the point across).

"for ten seconds, when I'm on the track, it's about fast and slow, it's not about black or white- for ten seconds I'm free"

When I'm doing a wod or out for a run, during those times, it's just about me.

I don't have 10,000 drop offs and pick ups, it doesn't matter that my sink is full of dishes, or that I was just awarded Worst Mom in the World.

I am not concerned that my bathrooms are overdue to be clean.

I don't care about making dinner.

Those black circles under my eyes mean nothing when I have no mirror for them to stare back at me.

I am not 40.

I am not short, tall, or anything- I just am.

When the clock turns on, my mind is free and I just work.  It is my chance to just be me, with no subtitles.

There are no problems and no worries when the clock turns on.

When the clock turns on, all my troubles seem to disappear.

For those five to twenty minutes, it's just about me.

The wod doesn't talk back, it doesn't judge, it doesn't reflect, it doesn't ask for too much, it doesn't leave messes for me to clean up, and it doesn't care- it does what I want it to and it lets me be me.

When the clock turns on, I just work.

Whether it's for ten seconds or twenty minutes, when the clock turns on and the wod starts, I am free.

Be A Blessing

Typically I make a detailed list of things I want to accomplish for the year.  This year, I am being more broad and decided I just want to be more of a blessing to others.

My kids are getting a little older (and a tiny bit less needy)- and I feel like I have a little more time now to give to others.  I also want my kids to be involved in this.  I'm not talking about going on a mission trip or even committing to an organization, I'm just talking about being a Plain old blessing.

How am I going to be a blessing?  Well, it's not planned out, it's just going to happen- kind of like a lot of random acts of kindness, except some won't be random.

A few years ago, when I turned 36, I spent my birthday doing 36 Random Acts of Kindness, except they weren't all random because I had to plan them out to make sure I did them, and honestly by the end of the day, I was tired.  I did a lot of good, fun things, but it kind of became a chore to get that number.

Life gets hard and can bring you down sometimes.  There seems to always be some new upsetting story on the news.  There needs to be more good in this world and I plan on doing my part to make that happen.

My goal is to bring a smile to more people's faces.  I cannot say all the ways I can do this, but when I'm in the situation, I will know what to do.

That day I did the 36 acts of kindness, one thing I did-which I plan to do more of, was hung up a sign with slips of paper to tear off, that said "need a smile, take one" and I had my daughter draw smiley faces on it- it still makes me smile to think about it.

Being a blessing can be as simple as saying "hello, how are you today", showing that I care and notice a person.

I plan to write more letters to my grandmother- she's 86 and she lives alone- I know what a blessing it would be for her to receive hand written letters.

Other ideas I have in the back of my mind are delivering dinner to a friend, holding doors, asking more questions, remembering details during a conversation, giving more compliments, writing letters, sending birthday cards, lending a hand, extending an invitation to dinner, sharing good books, making people laugh, and leaving positive quote cards for people who need them to take them.

We are only here for a finite amount of time and I plan to make the most of mine.  This year I want to help others see more light, do more good, and smile more.

Imagine how different life would be if we could all slow down just a little bit and be more of a blessing to others when we see them needing it most.

Find Your People

Find your people.

I'm not talking about people who are the same race, gender, income bracket, career, age, etc.

I'm not talking about people who are necessarily stronger, faster, more skilled, better cooks, professional seamstresses, prettier, or smarter.

I'm talking about people who make you better.

I'm talking about people who are just there to be your people.  There's no competition, there's no comparing, there's just listening, laughing, learning, and companionship.

I hadn't been to church in a while, and I decided it was time to recommit to going every week.  This Sunday the message was about being a part of a circle or a group- because we just need people.  Whenever I leave church, I usually feel inspired to write on here, I end up taking out my phone and jotting down a bunch of notes on my iPhone notes to remember for later.  My mind is literally working in overdrive after I leave church, usually full of ideas of how I can be better.

The message at church always makes me better, the pastor is my people.

About two weeks ago, I met with some friends at crossfit to learn how to knit (yes, I realize, I'm not 70).  It was a skill I had never been taught and I wanted to learn.  Our group consists of ladies in age from 26- over 50- we have a great time and laugh- maybe I'll never knit a perfect scarf, but that group makes me better.  I never feel like I am comparing myself or judging anyone, it is just a time to get together and laugh, learn, and be.

Crossknit is my new people.

Ok, I mentioned it, crossfit... Crossfit people make me better (not all but most)... choose your people. Move around the room and try different classes until you find your people.  The ones who will not judge you when you partially pee your pants during  double unders, the ones who will freak out when you get your first pull up, the ones who could give a care that you are using the trainer bar, or that you moved as slow as molasses, the ones who ask you how your day was- those are your people.

Crossfit has always been my people.

A friend and I took a cooking class together- we are not professional chefs.  We learned some new techniques, ate amazing food, but most importantly we had fun.  We laughed and talked and decided we would try to get together and cook more because we are each other's people.  We left feeling happy and inspired, instead of putting ourselves down that our food would never taste like that.

Friends and family are my people.

Go out and find your people, they are out there in all shapes, colors, sizes, and languages.

You make your own choices and it's up to you who your people are.  Find those people who can make you laugh, who you can be yourself around and who inspire you to be greater.  Those people who when you leave their presence, you still have a smile on your face.  Those people who don't even care that you have cat print leggings on.

Find your people and start living to be you.

To Feel Like a Winner

My son's football team lost every single game this season.  EVERY SINGLE ONE.  The team he was on last year made it to the Super Bowl and lost by one touch down.

Do I see a difference in his attitude at the end of the season this year versus last..absolutely not!

Last year he got about 3 touchdowns per game, this year he had 0 the entire season.  Would it have felt great for him to get one?  Sure... but does he care, NO! (so why should I).

If I were to ask him, "Son, do you feel like a winner or a loser?"- he would say neither.  He did not ask me to sign him up for football to be a winner or a loser.  He signed up to learn how to play, to make friends, and to have fun doing something he loves.

The thing he was the most upset about the season being over was that he won't get to go to practice anymore.  Sure, he can toss a ball in the yard, but you need a team to be on and a team to play against to have a game- win or lose, he just wants to be around others with the same interests.

I've been hearing parents say things about the coaches and about the league- and I'm wondering how many of them are looking in the mirror.  There are three factors involved here with the kids' attitudes and efforts- the kids themselves and what they hold within their hearts, their coaches and how they work with the team, and the parents' and what they say and how they react while their children are on and off the field.

As for the kid:  the kid that loves the sport, win or lose, is going to want to show up day in and day out.  My son freaked out if he wasn't at the field at 430 everyday for a 530 practice.  On days with no practice, he asks to go to the field to throw the ball around.  Everyday, his backpack barely zips because he brings a ball with him.  Whether his team won or lost on the weekend, he was still rearing to go to practice the following Tuesday.

Coaches, it's up to you to learn how to handle each player effectively. Use the right balance of encouragement and discipline.  To learn from mistakes and teach the kids how to get better.  Your words are ringing in their ears out on the field.

Parents:  your kid wants nothing more than to make you proud.  If you place so much emphasis on the team winning or your kid making a fabulous play, they might lose focus and instead of just playing and having fun, they're going to cave under the pressure.  I'm guilty.  I told my son if the team won yesterday I would take him and his friend to the movies.  I'm sure that's why he was crying on the way home- not because they lost, but because he "disappointed" me and now he couldn't go to the movies.  Take a step back and think, who is more upset about the loss, my kid or me...is my kid really into football or am I playing vicariously through them?

I was a competitive athlete growing up, and as an adult I still am.  I do well because I want to, not because anyone bribes me.  My parents did not always come to all of my track meets, but I still did well.  They never asked me to get first place.  They were never upset if our team didn't win meets- they didn't care because I was having fun.  As an adult, my husband does not say "get first in the competition today or don't come home".

If I don't win a competition, I do not blame myself, I do not blame the coaches at my crossfit box, and I do not blame my teammates.  I leave knowing I tried my best and learn what I need to do better for next time.

The glory of a win only lasts for so long.

So, back to the title of this post, "To Feel Like A Winner".

One of our parents said in a fury last night, "to feel like a winner, you have to win.  If you are always losing, you feel like a loser."

It's all about perspective.  In football, there are two teams, one will win and one will lose- inevitable.  Go do a 5K, there are hundreds, sometimes thousands of people, out of them only one wins- yet people keep showing up to these races.  If they all considered themselves losers, since only one of them is going to win, what's the point of showing up.  Who wants to legit make themself feel like a loser?

Here's how you feel like a winner- GET A NEW ATTITUDE!  Train hard, practice things you love with people you love, push yourself, make mistakes, and stop being negative.  Losing is sometimes the best thing that can happen- it builds character, it shows integrity when you come back the next week, and it gives you a clear picture on things you need to improve on.

I got 99 problems and my son's 10U football team winning a game ain't one!!!

You are more

You are more.

You are more than just the number on the scale.  You are body parts that are strong and functional.  You are the muscles recovering and building up from being pushed.  You are unstoppable.  You are a way better, more positive, and poised version of you.

You are more than your score on the whiteboard.  One day, one workout, one lift, these do not define you.  You are more.   You are the sweat you left on the floor that drenched your clothes.  You are the breath that you lost because you were working hard. You are stronger than yesterday. 

You are more than the clothes you wear. You are that extra spring in your step, you are that smile on your face- these are the accessories that make your outfit complete.  You are the muscles and curves that give you shape.

You are more than a mom or a dad.   You are a guiding light, illuminating a path for many eager followers.  You are inspiration.  You are a complete person because you take care of yourself so you can give more to others. 

You are more than just a face in the crowd.  You are confidence and joy.  You are my motivation.  Your movements keep me going too. Your effort inspires me to do more.  Your presence, your voice, they are all part of my experience.  You are more than just another person in the room. 

You are more than the size of your butt or your legs.  You are the person who lifted something they never thought possible.  You are a role model.  You are a friend and uplifter.  The size of your underwear is no measure of the size of your golden heart.  You are the happier mom who can tolerate more.  You are the one driving home feeling on top of the world because of what you can do.

You are more than your fears.  You are the example facing one scary thing then another.  You are the motivator, conquering things left and right.  You are empowered.  You are a life that is worth living.

A number does not define you, your life, the amount of friends you have, or the level of joy you are allowed to experience. 

You are so much more.

Be A Good Person

We always want to be good at stuff.

There are lots of things we are good at.

Being good at stuff is a wave- you are good at different things at different times.

One thing you can be good at all the time is being a good person.

If you just met me, you would not know that I was good at math (when I was in high school and college)- because I'm out of practice now.

If you workout with me at crossfit, you wouldn't know that I'm good at baking or sewing.

My husband used to be good at high jump in high school and college, but meeting him now, would you know?

We find things we enjoy doing and we practice to become good.  But, unless people are around us or joining us in that activity, they don't always recognize that we are good at it.

People can always recognize if you are a good person.

Being a good person follows you all.the.time.

You don't have to forget a skill or feel out of practice to be a good person- the reputation stays with you always.

People may not look back and say "Liz, oh yeah, she was on highest honor roll, but they can look back and say 'she was a good person'".

Be a good person to everyone you meet.  Maybe they all won't receive it well, but those who need it will.

Find lots of things to be good at, practice them- be good.  But don't get so focused on training to be good at stuff that you loose sight of something very important- being a good person.

Hold a door, give a compliment, surprise someone, don't gossip, help out, encourage, use kind words.

Be a good person.  It is something you can be all the time no matter what, no matter why, no matter how, no matter where, no matter when.